The most important relationship you will ever have is the one with yourself. At the end of the day, your opinion and value of yourself is what matters most. People can sense your level of confidence, and those who have ill intentions can smell your weaknesses and insecurities from miles away. THOSE people are the ones that are going to test you and teach you the toughest lessons.
Let me make it clear that the ones who prey on insecure girls have lower self-esteem issues themselves. But those people come into our lives to show us that we can be better, so much better.
I have personally invested too much time with many toxic people, and I stuck around longer than I should have because I would give them the benefit of the doubt. Despite knowing that these people were not good for my well-being, I chose not to listen to my gut. Here’s the thing, we humans are born and natural hunters. We can sense danger, bad energy, and even when someone is staring at us. So when your gut tells you that the company you’re around is unsafe, listen to it.
Surround yourself with people who inspire you, that you can call when you have a flat tire, and have the same values and goals as you do. A friend once told me, “If you want to soar with the eagles, you can’t be f*cking around with chickens”. And it’s very true, because you eventually become like the company you keep. If you want to be a CEO, hang out with CEO’s. If you solely hang out with people who party all the time, that’s eventually what you’ll become too. Most importantly, invest your time with people who love and value themselves too, and that will give you even more confidence and guidance to do so yourself.
It’s also okay to be selfish every now and then. There’s nothing wrong with putting yourself first. If it does not serve you, make you a better person, or feel better about yourself, feel free to say no or walk away. I have had moments where I’ve wanted to be a people pleaser, and it’s never worked out in my favor. Being a woman that knows what she wants, knows how she deserves to be treated, and has a mind of her own is probably the sexiest thing in my opinion.
Being mentally disciplined, doing what’s best for you, and commiting to loving yourself is the healthiest thing you can do. You simply cannot lose or feel defeated once you develop the skills to truly love yourself.
If you love, value, honor, and respect yourself, that energy will spread like wildfire to people you encounter. But like I said, there will always be people coming into your life to test you and belittle you. Don’t let them or let it get to you… They just haven’t learned to love themselves yet.